It's gonna happen.  It happens from time to time to almost everyone who is committed to a regular discipline of mediation and/or prayer.  In the last week and a half, no less than 7 of my clients have reported to me that their spiritual practice had stalled or become irregular in the holiday period.

The first thing to do is--let go of the guilt!  It's gonna happen.  Especially at this time of year with travel and extra responsibilities added onto already insanely busy lives.  The important thing is to get started again right away.  And remember that the benefits you have gained from your practice are not going to go away. 

Meditation teacher Shinzen Young is fond of saying, "If you can't be disciplined, be clever."  Here are some hints you might try to cleverly get back on track with your practice.

1.  Set a goal where you are sure to succeed.  Even if you were meditating 45 minutes twice a day before your practice stalled, when you restart your practice set a goal that you know you can meet, say 10 minutes, 5 times per week.  It will allow you to feel good about your practice again and will help you build momentum naturally for longer periods of practice.  And you might want to reflect if you stalled because you were biting off more than you can chew in terms of time spent in practice for your current life and circumstances. It is exponentially more effective to practice regularly for shorter periods of time than to practice for longer periods of time irregularly.

2.  Make yourself accountable.  Make a deal with your sangha, spiritual director, life coach, teacher or a friend that you will let them know that you have met your goal. Do this weekly, or even daily, until your practice is re-established. It can be really simple like sending them an e mail or a text.  

3.  Is the reason you are not practicing is because you are bored?  There is no reason to be.  A conversation with an experienced teacher can help you identify ways to modify or refine your practice so that you will be energized again.  You may also try some of the many guided meditations available on line.  (See my Youtube channel for some of them.)  

4.  Last, but perhaps most important, many times we stop practicing because our practice is about to reveal something about our lives that some part of us would rather not look at.  If you go ahead and practice anyway, you will probably find that what is revealed is not nearly as scary as you unconsciously feared.  So, if you become aware of the need to practice, but you find yourself resisting, check in mindfully and deeply for a moment to check if there is any reason for the resistance.  It will be enlightening.  

The days of the waning old year when we anticipate the new is a wonderful time to step back and look back on the year just past and to make some firm intentions for the year to come.  Here is a process you might want to consider for doing this.   

First, look back on the year just past.  If you happen to have kept a journal, that's perfect.  If not, you can just look over your date book or appointment calendar, starting with January.  This will help you remember what you were doing and what you were thinking and feeling this year.  Ask yourself if you have made spiritual progress in 2014.  How would you know?  Meditation teacher Shinzen Young has suggested 5 ways.  Did you progress, stay the same, or regress in any of these areas in the past year.

The first sign of spiritual progress is that you have less suffering.  This is especially true with mental suffering.  Were you captured less by afflictive emotions like self-pity,worry, resentment, hopelessness,  harsh judgement of yourself and others, or jealousy? Do you have more equanimity with the ups and downs of life? 


The second sign is that you have more fulfillment.  Do you have more moments of gratitude for all that you have been given in this life?  Have you truly enjoyed your friends and family, your work, your pastimes?  Have you been able to savor the moments of pleasure and joy in your life without tension, distraction or worry.  

The third sign of spiritual progress is that you have more insights into the nature of life and reality.  You gradually know yourself better and you are better able to understand the interconnections between things and between events.  You more often know instinctively the right thing to do in more and more situations.  

The fourth sign is that you are engaging in more positive behaviors and in fewer negative behaviors.  

The fifth and final sign is that you naturally and effortlessly find yourself acting with compassion and love in more situations.  You have a growing desire to show kindness and to reach out in service to lessen the suffering of the world.

Look back on 2014 and see where you stand today in each of these 5 areas.  You may want to write in your journal and make notes.  Then, ideally after a time, or even a day or two of meditation, prayer and/or reflection, set one or more intentions for 2015.  There probably shouldn't be more than 3.  These are not New Years resolutions, but deep commitments to yourself to transform and improve your life.  They should inspire you and not be an opportunity for failure or criticism. Write these intentions down and reflect on them throughout the coming year.